The sudden wave of emotion that really drags you down.. down under..
Things and thoughts that are kept long enough will burst out as tears..
Seeing friends that are in relationship jealousy drive by..
They have people by their sides now.. as a friend you are still important but.. not that much anymore..
They have shoulder to cry on.. you have a pillow to soak wet..
They have people to laugh with.. you have the virtual world to state it..
You don't become a lesser friend to them.. but the responsibility had became easier..
You don't bug them as often..Afraid that you might disturb their time..
You became the awkward and the uncomfy one because you don't feel at ease among them..
and you always wonder when is your time to "shine"
your time to feel less awkward and more comfortable..
Putting up your game face as if nothing has change..
But deep down inside you felt that you are from a different dimension..
They welcome you.. introduce you to the new part of their life..
You felt happy for them.. you blessed them to have a strong relation..
But on the other side you felt that you are standing alone.. on the desert..
You feel like an outcast.. having to listen to their world..
A world that doesn't exist in your world..
You feel their present and they will always be there for you..
But you don't reach out to them..
You always tell them that you love them but they have the greatest love..
You always said you will be there and support them but they have their greatest supporter with them
You always tell yourselves that it's okay..
It's okay to be who you are..
It's okay to keep hanging out with them..
It's okay to give relationship advise..
It's okay to be an outcast..
It's okay as long as they don't know what are you thinking..
Paste a big smile and laugh at their joke..
Or even join to back stab some others..
Keep on telling yourselves that it's okay..
Keep the awkward feeling aside.. keep the outcast feeling aside.. try hard to blend in...
Be the one they always thought who you are..
Don't change suddenly or they might sense something is off..
Don't be less responsive or they might thought you are not interested with what they shared..
Tell yourselves they have found a better you..
They don't need you as much as before..
They will only come to you when they need extra support..
They are still loving you but a little lesser than before..
Don't be a stranger and don't be the weird one..
Keep yourselves at a steady pace and maybe situation will be a little bit better
PMS-ing
V-LAINE
XOXO
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